The Secret to Yodelling!

I’ve spent many long days
Mounted upon a cowey steed
There packed on it’s back
Is everything I’d ever need
But all that time spent alone
Can play tricks on your head
You start yakking to yourself
And arguein’ with what you’ve said

Most times I’d lose the argument
Be left feelin’ somewhat defeated
That’ s when I hatched up an idea
Right there where I was seated
I’d teach myself to cowboy yodel
Like Montana Slim or Wilf Carter
I’ll learn all their secret tricks like
Yodee-ol-lady-who for a starter

So I worked on this yodel business
For pert near a month and a half
Practising at every opportunity
Though the boys did have a laugh
I wasn’t to be deterred from my dream
Even when cats screeched and ran for cover
Or windows would spontaneously crack
They say life’s not easy for a yodel lover

But even with all the time and work
The nuances of the yodel eluded me
Even after wedging up my underwear
To hit those higher notes you see
And though I practised day after day
Folks would still cry and cover an ear
Herds of animals would stampede
From horses, dogs, gophers to deer

It was then I stumbled on the secret
So strange it’s hard to believe
In the dark I wandered out of camp
My bladder I had to relieve
I leaned on an old fence post
And began to sigh and let it go
Instantly I felt the most severe pain
Just a travellin’ up the flow

I opened my mouth and to my surprise
A yodel popped out beautiful as can be
Just like those singing cowboys of old
Who would of thought from little old me
I yodelled in pure cowboy style
And the secret I will now dispense
Though trust me it’s a real shocker
I just peed on that electric fence!